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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.

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• (323): View more from California

  I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?

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• (650): View more from California

  Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.

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• (510): View more from California

  Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.

  (1-510): View more from California

  That is one convoluted booty call.

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?

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• (151): View more from

  I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.

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• (361): View more from Texas

  remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.

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