Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
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