Porn is love you can see.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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