This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize