DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
