What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
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I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
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The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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