The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize