we made out on top of his cat.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
