:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
