No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
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She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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