He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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