no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Church boner. Awkwardddd
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy