Kiss
Puke
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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