How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
