wakey wakey hands off snakey
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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