how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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