i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
This house was built for laser tag.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
