I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I FOUND THE LEGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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