I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
So. Much. Porn.
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