I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
