So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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