in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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