my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
