Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
