I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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