It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You pole danced in your parka.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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