So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
