Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
The best revenge is premature balding
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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