this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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