Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Randomize
