I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
