gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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