And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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