Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
My Higher Power is John Stamos
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Help. Why am I so naked?
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