I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
