I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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