She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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