Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I'm really busy with my period
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