I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
