A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
