Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
