i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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