I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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