at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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