words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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