never play flip cup with pint glasses
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize