woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
