whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Randomize