This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
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i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
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It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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