Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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